I’ve literally forgotten like EVERYTHING about 4th grade and 6th grade EXCEPT…

  • In 4th grade one time I accidentally got a staple stuck in my thumb
  • In 6th grade about a week before our “graduation” I sneezed in class and blew snot all over my hand, my teacher thought I was crying, but I was like “I’m okay, I just need a tissue, I can’t move my hand” and it was really gross

Those are literally the only 2 things I remember from those years.


I BOUGHT MY TICKET TO COPENHAGEN TODAAAAAY!!

And as Bastian said - “Shit’s gettin real!”


Bastian told me over the weekend that it was TIME to buy my tickets to Sweden!! (really Copenhagen Denmark bc it’s chepaer to fly into there and I’m gonna take a train into Sweden…) but anyways, I couldn’t over the weekend so TONIGHT I get to buy my ticket!!!


situpsandfruitcups:

Benefits of big hips:

Laundry basket rest
Yoga pants
Tiny human rest
Full size human rest
Hip checking those who challenge you
Ability to swing them wider than a cadillac
Model walk is 10x more dramatic
Taking up more space
Looking like a fertility goddess


giragu:

im sick of nts being like “its not nice to be violent and mean because of your mental illness uwuwuwu” im not here to appeal to neurotypicals fuck off

(Source: mybpdfeels)


atttackoneyebrows:

geekyartchick:

jaclcfrost:

imagine ur otp

doing

the forehead touch

now imagine ur otp doing the forehead touch

as one of them dies in the other’s arms

… That was uncalled for.


Charlie Hunnam as Patric in Children of Men (2006)

WHERE HAS THIS BEEN ALL MY LIFE?!!?! (or for the past 8 years)

I had the HUGEST crush on Charlie Hunnam with his gross locs when this movie came out omg

(Source: charliehnnm)


My sister was telling me about her crush - some boy named Corey, and then decides to go off on a tirade about a girl named Topanga who ALSO likes Corey and I was like “Hold up, you’re shitting me right?” And she was like “What? This is serious!” And I had to tell her that there was once a show called Boy Meets World where two people - Corey and Topanga, meet at school, fall in love, and get married. My sister was like “NOOOOO!” I stg if that little Topanga girl (who I’m going to assume was named after the TV character) starts dating Corey her parents are going to be ecstatic xD


So this blog we’re supposed to be doing for class… 2 people haven’t posted up their shit yet and class starts in 2 hours and I’m supposed to be the commentator on one of the posts. So these people need to get their shit together.


thelilnan:

tis the season

I’m really upset that this turned out to not be real. Durex should totally reconsider because DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH MONEY THEY’D MAKE OFF OF PUMPKIN SPICE CONDOMS?!

thelilnan:

tis the season

I’m really upset that this turned out to not be real. Durex should totally reconsider because DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH MONEY THEY’D MAKE OFF OF PUMPKIN SPICE CONDOMS?!


Tagged by fashionableai

Fill in the blanks and tag 6 people.

Basics

  1. Name: Invidia “Envy”
  2. Birthday: June 20
  3. Favorite numbers: 666
  4. Height: 5’5.5”
  5. Talents: Bullshitting my way through life, kissing ass
  6. Can you juggle?: Nope
  7. Art/Sports/Both: Art - unless we’re talking German football ;)
  8. Do you like writing?: I do!
  9. Do you like dancing?: Only when I’m drunk
  10. Do you like to sing?: Not really

Fantasize

  1. Dream vacation: Oh lawd, there’s so many places I wanna go but to be honest the only place I care about being right now is with my boyfriend, so wherever the hell he is would be a vacation to me <3
  2. Dream Guy/Gal/Other: Bastian <3 Haha, honestly I never had a “dream person” but I think he could easily be it
  3. Dream Wedding: Something in the fall, at a winery, very simple, a black dress instead of white, not very traditional… maybe on Halloween?
  4. Dream pet: Hairless cat
  5. Dream job: Stay at home wife to a rich, amazing husband (not even kidding)

Music

  1. Favourite song: “Werewolf” by CocoRosie
  2. Favorite Album: “Bangerz” by Miley Cyrus (sorry)
  3. Last song I heard on the radio: I don’t even know o__o
  4. Least favorite song: The only one in particular that I can think of at the moment is “Bad Day” by… Daniel Powder?
  5. Least favorite album: I don’t know
  6. Least favorite artist: I’ll stick with what Gin said and go with Justin Beiber and Robin Thicke xD

Preferences for partners

  1. Girls/Guys/Both: Both!
  2. Hair color: I generally like darker hair color
  3. Eye color: Not important, all eye colors are beautiful!
  4. Humorous or Serious: Both
  5. Taller or Shorter: Closer to being my heigh please
  6. Biggest turn-off: Yes, Gin is right - sexist comments are shitty, sheer stupidity is annoying, and not having good hygiene kills me
  7. Biggest turn on: I really don’t know… boy moans? like sexual ones…?

.....WAT. The explanation is still pretty lolwut.

lol clearly you’ve never been a college girl (ʘ‿ʘ)


dremoranightmares:

oh god i tried to explain i’d’ve and y’all’d’ve to a friend who is a korean exchange student and she just kind of stared at me in horror for a minute lmao

dremoranightmares:

oh god i tried to explain i’d’ve and y’all’d’ve to a friend who is a korean exchange student and she just kind of stared at me in horror for a minute lmao

(Source: dntdodrugs)


WAT

Oh, I meant dildo** not dido (stupid autocorrect) and by brother I mean fraternity brother - who is a female, because our fraternity is co-ed… but ya, she and her roomies share a dildo named Clarence and like to stick it around the apartment and wave it around people’s faces xD


My brother has a dido named Clarence

My brother has a dido named Clarence